Meaningless Meanderings

Contemplating Cherry Blossoms

For those who did not read my last (and somewhat incoherent) post, I traveled to Washington, D.C. for a job interview. When I was originally accepted for the interview, I realized how difficult it was to book my travel and hotel, and soon realized that the Cherry Blossom Festival occurred on the same weekend.

The Cherry Blossom Festival is a holiday dedicated to that short span of time when the Japanese cherry trees bloom. The initial days of the “festival” are dedicated to the first of these trees that bloom, while the next few weeks carry a collection of minor events as more begin to bloom.

The idea of the holiday originally began in Japan, and is almost an opposite of “Momiji,” which is a holiday in the fall. Both Momiji and Sakura Matsuri (Cherry Blossom Festival) are dedicated to the cycle of nature; of death and rebirth. In the fall, we watch the maple tree leaves change into shades of red, while in spring we admire the beauty of these lovely buds of pink as they bloom into beautiful flowers that signify not only rebirth, but the idea that beauty is only temporary as they fade from our sight in a matter of weeks.

This idea of rebirth, of second chances, is something I was greatly appreciating and waiting for. My interview was another representation of a second chance; a second chance to return to Japan, a second chance to teach, a second chance to travel the world. I sadly was not given the chance I was hoping for, as I am now on a train to return to Lock Haven without a job.

But this post is not to rant about how life is unfair, or how I feel about loss of the job opportunity (and if you are curious, I am in rather high spirits). This post is to say how this holiday caused me to think about not only my time in Japan, but what my future has in store.

It started with the idea of beauty. My time in Japan, like these flowers, was only a short period of time in comparison to my life. One year, while seemingly long, is a fleeting moment to human life, and equivalent to a blink in the life of a tree. While it was an amazing time, and beautiful in its own way, it was not to be permanent. It was a short-lived event that was amazing to live through at least once.

After I settled that idea and took a few photos, I began to contemplate this idea of rebirth. I originally believed that this concept was a good omen of my return to Japan, a sign that I would continue traveling, and the belief that after I left my life would be different. Only the last part is true. While re-thinking each step of the trip, I began to re-evaluate the idea of rebirth. Perhaps the omen that I believed I saw was not for a return to Japan, but a symbol of rising from the ashes and pursuing a new life. It's possible that I am entirely wrong in trying to apply for a teaching position, or maybe now is not the time to do so. The possibilities were beginning to make my head spin, but I had a moment of clarity that cannot be placed into words; I began to make peace with this idea.

Once I returned to my hotel, feeling much better than I had when I left, I began to reconsider the situation as a whole. Yes, I spent a great deal of money for no financial return. Yes, I missed two classes that have pushed me behind and I must now struggle to catch up. Yes, I wasted 2 days in travel time that could have been spent doing something productive. But I realized that I am leaving Washington with experience, and a reminder of what I had overlooked. I'm leaving with two new friends, a collection of photos, and a new (and possibly better) outlook. It may not seem like a fair trade at times, but cost isn't always easy to determine, as the value of something is based on the person who desires it.

As for rebirth, one of my new friends was given the opportunity for the second interview, and may even be given the job. This friend was concerned that I would be angry, but if anything, I am happy for them. They have never traveled to Japan, never learned Japanese, and I don't believe they have had any experience with teaching. For this person, this weekend, the weekend of the cherry blossom festival, is a sign of rebirth and new chances. I am now wishing them the best as I continue my long journey to Lock Haven.

As for me, I have a few other possibilities. I am still young and have a great deal of experiences and skill that will assist me in finding a new job. Then again, that is all I can ask for.

Before I leave, I would like to leave you with a quote from the song “Closing Time” that always reminds me of the two holidays: “Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end.” I think it is about time for that new beginning.